almostwitty

actionreplay is going to a London Underground-themed fancy dress party, and was looking for suggestions for costumes based on tube stations (ruling out Victoria, Angel or Kings Cross as that’s far too obvious).

In less than 3 minutes, my brain came up with the following suggestions that I’d never enact:

Shepherds’ Bush Market – go as a shepherd, with a codpiece upon which market vegetables are stuck.

Queensway – dress up as the Queen, with a placard saying “This is my way!”

Waterloo – a portable urinal with some handy drinking water nearby?

Elephant and Castle – a hat which looks like a castle, with an elephant on it?

White City – just a white bra, and perhaps a hearing aid…

Cockfosters - erm…. well, you’ll need a can of Fosters. And possibly a male chicken.

Care to add to this fun list?

Mirrored from almost witty.

While shove_this_job was in London, she'd often shock me speechless by telling me she’d talked to two, or four random strangers in London - AND THEY'D TALK BACK! I am of course, putting this down to her irrepressible (and believe me, I’ve tried!) optimism, bounciness and general all-American (in a positive way) manner.

Something odd must be in the London water supply, because there’s now a campaign to Get The Tube Talking on Wed 17 December. They suggest engaging fellow commuters on the tube with some small chit-chat and small talk. Except they haven’t actually suggested what lines of small talk to use - and I for one, am not that brilliant at chatting to random strangers. What can I say that isn’t too boring? Hell, I just had a meeting, and I completely forgot to shake the guy’s hand on my way out the door.

Also, these days given the sheer amount of shopping bags that bring out the inner environmentalist Marxist in me, I’d be far likely to bark out “WHY. ON. EARTH. DO. YOU. NEED. SIX SHOPPING BAGS AND TWO HANDBAGS? GET OUT OF MY WAY!”

Fortunately, I take the bus to work. Or bike.

Originally published at almost witty. You can comment here or there.